HAPP Y NESS

There are so many times I think to myself, "Utah would be a perfect state if it only had an ocean." It is a true fact. The only reason I would want to ever move out of this state would be to live nearer to the ocean. I have officially introduced my husband to it and now he is addicted...not nearly as much as I am, though. I cannot wait until I have children and I can introduce them to the great beautiful blue of the sea. I told my husband that we have to be rich when we "grow up" because I want to go as much as possible.

I have some fun and peculiar stories to tell of our experience by the sea on our honeymoon. We went to a beach called Gazo's which is probably one of my favorite on the central coast of California. The picture above is not of Gazo's by the way. However, the picture below is of a curious artifact that we found in the sand. At first glance, I thought it was part of a jellyfish. But, after picking it up and examining it - yes, with my bear hands (oh, my!) - I realized that it was way too thick and hard to be part of a jellyfish. After much examination, Rob and I both came to the conclusion that it was some poor woman's breast implant. Yes, a breast implant. How do you loose something like that? That's my question. It must be a consperacy. It had to be something like that because we found about twenty more implants just like this one below. So, my belief is that a ginormous yaht full of drunken plastic surgeons initiating someone else into thier "gang" had a huge stunt involving hundreds of breast implants...and then everything went wrong.

My next story is about a little stream of death and putresence. Below is a picture of such a stream. We were walking along the beach and saw this stream from a distance. It looked like a coke stream. I was excited to get close up to it because I had never seen water look this color. It was like something out of Willy Wonka's Magic Factory of Horrors. We got up to it and it smelled as if something had puked, then died, then bled out, then puked again and sat in the sun for a year straight. Yes, it was that bad. As i plugged my nose I wandered up towards the pool expecting to find human remains or something like you would see on CSI. But, no, just the putresence remained. "Rubbish, Slime, Muck!" But, oh was it fun to see!

And yes, this beach is still my favorite beach, I just won't be building sandcastles or jumping in water near this part.